Life of a small boar

Goodbye, for now =)

2011-12-03T13:11:00.003+08:00

Gonna be inactive for awhile until I do a thorough makeover for my blog. As I approach a new phase of my life, I feel the urge and need to makeover my blog. After all, I do hope that I'm no longer that stubborn smallboar that tends to run ahead of God. After all the ups and downs, after all the magnificent things God did in my life, I do hope that I have learnt to be more humble. So yea, will be gone for awhile. Stay tune!!! =P

He Speaks

2011-11-05T15:21:00.003+08:00

Today, God spoke to me.

A CHAT WITH JESUS CHRIST...

Jesus: Hello. Did you call me?

Man: Called you? No.... Who is this?

Jesus: This is Jesus. I heard your prayers. So I thought I will chat.

Man: I do pray. Just makes me feel good. I am actually busy now. I am in the midst of something.

Jesus: What are you busy at? Ants are busy too.

Man: Don’t know. But I can’t find free time. Life has become hectic. It’s rush hour all the time.

Jesus: Sure. Activity gets you busy. But productivity gets you results. Activity consumes time. Productivity frees it.

Man: I understand. But I still can’t figure out. By the way, I was not expecting YOU to buzz me on instant messaging chat.

Jesus: Well I wanted to resolve your fight for time, by giving you some clarity. In this net era, I wanted to reach you through the medium you are comfortable with.

Man: Tell me, why has life become complicated now?

Jesus: Stop analyzing life. Just live it. Analysis is what makes it complicated.

Man: why are we then constantly unhappy?

Jesus: Your today is the tomorrow that you worried about yesterday. You are worrying because you are analyzing. Worrying has become your habit. That’s why you are not happy.

Man: But how can we not worry when there is so much uncertainty?

Jesus: Uncertainty is inevitable, but worrying is optional.

Man: But then, there is so much pain due to uncertainty.

Jesus: Pain is inevitable, but suffering is optional.

Man: If suffering is optional, why do good people always suffer?

Jesus: Diamond cannot be polished without friction. Gold cannot be purified without fire. Good people go through trials, but don’t suffer. With that experience their life become better not bitter.

Man: You mean to say such experience is useful?

Jesus: Yes. In every term, Experience is a hard teacher. She gives the test first and the lessons afterwards.

Man: But still, why should we go through such tests? Why can’t we be free from problems?

Jesus: Problems are Purposeful Roadblocks Offering Beneficial Lessons (to) Enhance Mental Strength. Inner strength comes from struggle and endurance, not when you are free from problems.

Man: Frankly in the midst of so many problems, we don’t know where we are heading.

Jesus: If you look outside you will not know where you are heading. Look inside. Looking outside, you dream. Looking inside, you awaken. Eyes provide sight. Heart provides insight.

Man: Sometimes not succeeding fast seems to hurt more than moving in the right direction. What should I do?

Jesus: Success is a measure as decided by others. Satisfaction is a measure as decided by you. Knowing the road ahead is more satisfying than knowing you rode ahead. You work with the compass. Let others work with the clock.

Man: In tough times, how do you stay motivated?

Jesus: Always look at how far you have come rather than how far you have to go. Always count your blessing, not what you are missing.

Man: What surprises you about people?

Jesus: When they suffer they ask, “Why me?" When they prosper, they never ask “Why me” Everyone wishes to have truth on their side, but few want to be on the side of the truth.

Man: Sometimes I ask, who am I, why am I here? I can’t get the answer.

Jesus: Seek not to find who you are, but to determine who you want to be. Stop looking for a purpose as to why you are here. Create it. Life is not a process of discovery but a process of creation.

Man: How can I get the best out of life?

Jesus: Face your past without regret. Handle your present with confidence. Prepare for the future without fear.

Man: One last question. Sometimes I feel my prayers are not answered.

Jesus: There are no unanswered prayers. At times the answer is NO.

Man: Thank you for this wonderful chat. I am so happy to start the day with a new sense of inspiration.

Jesus: Well. Keep the faith and drop the fear. Don’t believe your doubts and doubt your beliefs. Life is a mystery to solve, not a problem to resolve. Trust me. Life is wonderful if you know how to live.

Man: Thank you so much.

Jesus: You are always welcome. Have a good day my friend. "Always remember, God's Word is the Word for YOU ."

By: Aries Quismundo

Thank you =)

2011-10-20T17:45:00.003+08:00

I know this is a bit overdue. I just want say thank you for the thoughtfulness and the simple joy brought to me on this day. It has been quite awhile sine I last have a birthday cake.

2011-10-12T03:23:00.001+08:00

At that moment, I think I could understand 1/100 the pain Jesus felt when Peter denied Him.

2011-10-12T02:11:00.002+08:00

Someday, you might realize that you did the exact same mistake.
Someday, when it is too late.

2011-10-05T20:57:00.001+08:00

Maybe I should get a shirt like this. LOL

2011-10-01T00:32:00.001+08:00

When will pain go away for real and stop coming back?
When will that hollowness stop echoing?
When will the past really be the past?

Will I Drown?

2011-07-02T21:10:00.002+08:00

*A visitor at a fishing dock asked an old fisherman who was sitting there, "If I were to fall into this water, would I drown?" It was a strange way of asking how deep the water was, but the fisherman had a good answer. "No. Falling into the water doesn't drown anybody. It's staying under it that does." Remember … temptation is not sin. It is an invitation to sin. Just say “no.”*

Dear Father, I pray that You help us to stay far from the edge of they dock. Keep us from playing at the edge and prevent us from dipping our feet in to taste that calm and inviting cool water when it might satisfy us just temporarily. Especially when we can't even swim! Grant us wisdom, Lord, that your children will learn to obey Your instructions and do things the way You planned, to take Your hand and follow You step by step. Give us strength to be disciplined and obedient because to You we want to surrender our life. To You all the brothers and sisters in Christ I commit and in Jesus's name I pray, Amen.

I want to be set free

2011-06-27T16:52:00.003+08:00

Passage below taken from girlfriendsingod.com devotional material.

*Dr. Billy Graham tells the story of a little child who was playing with a very valuable vase. The child put his hand into the vase but could not pull it out. His father tried to free the little boy’s hand, but couldn’t. They were thinking of breaking the vase when the father said, “Son, let’s try one more time. Open your hand and hold your fingers out really straight and then pull.” The look of alarm on the boy’s face surprised the dad until the little boy explained, “Oh no, Father. I can’t hold my fingers like that. If I did, I would drop my penny.”

Many of us are like that little boy – holding onto something that is keeping us from letting go and letting God have His way in our lives. It doesn’t really matter what that something is. If it is keeping us from surrendering to God, it is our captor and we are its hostage.*

Dear Father, I want to be set free. Please, help me let go of what I feel is of value to me(the penny) so I can have complete release from the bondage(the vase). I didn't realize how hard I have been holding this penny in my palm until I start to hurt myself with the strong grasp, affecting not just my palm or hands but my whole body. It also hinders other routines or activities of the body. Lord, I want to be set free. Thank you for your love, Lord. In Jesus's name I pray, Amen.

The Pond

2011-05-06T17:45:00.002+08:00

Once a crystal clear pond,
even when droplets of rain disrupt the peace on the surface
it was never long til waves subside and
the depth visible

Now, buried within stones and withered leaves
slides of mud constantly stirred to cloud the clear water
no longer source of water that is readily giving
for hiding inside are things not known off

Even if precious pearl is buried deep down
under the layers that block the rays of sunlight
there it stays the lone gem
time will pass and nothing will be of importance anymore

Decline Not His Call

2011-03-12T17:33:00.003+08:00

There are alot of times when we're in the middle of a cross-road not knowing where we should go or what God wants us to do. At times like this, we pray earnestly or seek frustratingly for a direction. We're keen on any little guide or pointers He may have for us. Sounds familiar....

However, there are also times when we're sure that God is talking to us, yet we tend to ignore because we simply don't feel like obeying. That small still voice that tends to nudge at our hearts, prompting us to do certain things or go certain ways.. Sometimes, it annoys us slightly.. enough to make us to not take heed.

Alot of times, following God's plan seems good when it goes with our plan, or when we don't have a plan. However, we may tend to decline God's call to follow His plan when it interrupt our plan, when we have the near future lay out in front of us and we just want to do exactly that to achieve exactly what we want.

Even though we know it in our head that God's plan is always the best, sometimes we just forget. Therefore, we have to remind ourselves everyday, to follow Him. We never know what, where and when He can use us. What it might mean to other people when we do this little thing God ask us to do. How others may benefit if we can just listen to Him and go a little out of our way for people. Faith, is answering His call everyday even though we may not know what's gonna happen next.

Do not screen and decline His call like how we'd do with our cellphone's incoming call. Put His line at the priority. Listen and obey. Lives will change, ours and others.

"Jesus replied, “Anyone who loves me will obey my teaching" (John 14:23a).

let life be led by Him

2011-01-25T20:55:00.003+08:00

'Jesus always goes with us when He gives us directions.'

Often, even though we know the choice to make and the route to take, fear is still by no means absent. Fear for unknown, fear for all possible outcome.

However, knowing that God will walk down the directions He point us to with us is a great comfort. Nothing will be too hard, no fall too pain when we have the Lord guarding over us. The confidence that He will not simply point us a direction and leave us to fight our own battle shall ease our worries.

Walking with Him is a lifetime learning process. From time to time, we shall undoubtly go astray from the right path. Yet again and again He shall tug us back to Him gently, a little harder at times when we get stubborn but if we learn to listen and obey, we can avoid taking a long, hard detour of life. Be led by Him.

Vow of Purity

2011-01-20T15:58:00.005+08:00

Today I came across a post on Vanness Wu's blog, that introduces a book called the Moral Revolution Book. It talks about the value of virginity and honors of marriage in today's world. The importance of knowing what it really means to love someone and why certain things should wait.

This reminds me of my own vow of purity made many many years ago. To be exact, 23rd October 2006. It's a contract with God, to wait for true love, and to love in His way.

There is chapter excerpts of the book available here;
http://moralrevolution.com/moral-revolution-book#Chapter%201
and these alone brings great ponder. Among the many things I like from there;

"Your virginity is a treasure hidden in the vault of your life, protected by the helmet of your virtues, values, and principles"

"True love germinates in the soil of sacrifice, sprouts in the garden of surrender, and matures in a matrimony of servanthood. Love isn't love until it has cost you something to give it away."

The Boy (^.^)

2011-01-12T23:18:00.004+08:00

Jonathan @ JonJon

my godsis's son
this kid had given me countless laughter lately
he's adorable
he's trusting
he's shy
he's sweet
and
he loves me!!!

look at his cheeky face

all the lil things he does
are just cute max
I will definitely miss him at the end of this hols

I love him too (^.^)
soooooo cute

*sigh*
why do boys never stay this cute when they grow up >.<

Just Love

2011-01-05T21:24:00.001+08:00

I used to think that love is a choice. But today, Pastor Jaeson Ma taught me that love is not just a choice. It's far and much more than that.

Pastor Jaeson Ma became a rapper at the age of 13, had a radical encounter with God at the age of 16 and was later called to surrender his dreams in the entertainment world to become a pastor. His talent in music however, enabled him to also be a gospel messenger in the entertainment industry. Entertainers such as Vanness Wu had come to know God through Jaeson Ma.

Last year, Jaeson Ma started on a 365days love mission, to show at least one act of love each day. His journey of learning and discovering love is recorded in his blog. Click here for the original post and link to his blog.

Love is true. Love is painful. Love is not easy. Love can be messy. Love is powerful. Love can change you. Love is difficult. Love is commitment. Love is what hate is not. Love learns. Love always listens. Love doesn’t hold onto the wrongs. Love overlooks the sin. Love looks into the heart. Love can be gained. Love can be lost. Love is possible. Love forgives, every time. Love doesn’t lie. Love is always worth a try. Love makes you laugh. Love makes you cry. Love hurts so bad. Love can’t be explained, but love can be felt. Love knows. Love is unconditional. Love accepts you just the way you are. Love protects, defends and fights to the end. Love prefers. Love will sacrifice all for the sake of another. Love is not afraid. Love is full of courage. Love begins with God, then it starts with you. Love takes time. Love doesn’t make sense sometimes. Love is beautiful. Love can be ugly. Love shows kindness. Love is not blind, love sees. Love is compassion. Love can be desperate. Love is discovered when you are broken. Love is in the little things. Love is caught in the most unseen moments. Love is deep, never shallow. Love lends a hand. Love feeds the hungry. Love doesn’t think of itself first, but always others. Love doesn’t demand it’s rights. Love trusts. Love lets go. Love doesn’t blame others. Love takes responsibility. Love doesn’t hold grudges. Love doesn’t compare. Love always believes. Love is risky. Love is worth taking the risk even if it means being hurt. Love is a lesson. Love is all we have. Love feels. Love is distant. Love is close. Love is in every heart. Love dreams. Love encourages. Love is crazy. Love makes you do crazy ridiculous things. Love sucks. Love is a drug. Love is everything. Love bleeds. Love was hung on a cross for all our sins. Love doesn’t see fault. Love gives you what you don’t deserve. Love hates. Love loves. Love is madness. Love is lonely sometimes. Love speaks. Love is silent. Love is loud. Love is discipline. Love is uncomfortable. Love is humble. Love enjoys. Love has fun. Love eats. Love sleeps. Love is an adventure. Love brings peace. Love doesn’t judge. Love embraces. Love gives big hugs. Love smiles. Love dances. Love is always down to help. Love is there for you when you need it the most. Love cares. Love is alive. Love is full of tears. Love makes the heart heavy, like right now. Love will heal with time. Love doesn’t need an answer every time. Love prays. Love hopes. Love never ever gives up. Love is repentant. Love is sorry. Love gets back up again. Love tries. Love pushes you to your limits. Love is scary. Love doesn’t work out always. Love can teach you a good lesson. Love is better than lust. Love gives everything it has. Love doesn’t hold back. Love is not cheap, but costly. Love is a choice. Love is not forced. Love doesn’t take advantage. Love respects. Love always seeks for the best interest of others. Love is giving up what you want, for the wants of another. Love is a promise unbroken. Love is your word. Love doesn’t play games. Love is serious. Love isn’t learned in a day, but learned in a lifetime. Love will make you get on your knees. Love waits. Love moves on. Love is hard. Love is generous. Love kills. Love brings life. Love doesn’t point the finger. Love looks within. Love always wins. Love grows. Love is example. Love is faithful. Love is understanding. Love is full of grace. Love is truth. Love gives roses. Love is finer than wine. Love is found in Paris. Love is lost in life. Love is creative & love creates. Love is a struggle. Love comes and love goes. Love gets mad. Love sometimes yells. Love is brutal. Love is affection. Love transforms. Love is sex done God’s way. Love is pure like a newborn baby. Love is childish. Love is mature. Love is being yourself. Love is loving yourself. Love can. Love is freedom. Love is radical. Love is rad. Love can lead to war. Love will defend the poor. Love is just. Love always does what is right. Love is coming clean. Love is new every morning. Love is there every night, you just have to look for it. Love is in the darkness. Love shines like the dawn. Love is warm. Love is cold too. Love repents. Love is willing to change. Love does what is necessary. Love doesn’t just talk, it walks. Love can feel like a jail cell. Love comes in different forms is expressed in different ways. Love is a language. Love serves. Love is quality time. Love is a gift. Love is heard. Love is physical, don’t be afraid to touch. Love plans. Love is also spontaneous. Love is a surprise. Love is wise. Love can be learned in every life experience good or bad. Love makes the heart happy. Love can’t be taken away, unless you let it. Love is something else. Love doesn’t focus on self. Love is God. Yes, God is love. Love yourself, then you can love others. Love is a golden rule for life. Love is life. Love is family. Love is true friends who love you not for what you can do, but for who you are. Love is what we were created for. Love is big. Love is not noticed. Love is stealth. Love is all around. Love is a song. Love is a presence. Love is worship. Love gives glory. Love always has a story to tell. Love looks like Jesus. Love doesn’t always feel good, but it is good. Love is fearless & faith-full. Love is drama haha. Love takes two. Love is infinite. Love forgets. Love is not full of itself. Love is not addicted, love is self controlled. Love hates evil. Love will not boast or brag. Love is the kindest person you will ever meet. Love is real. Love keeps it real. Love is truthful, it doesn’t beat around the bush. Love is in the eyes. Love can be painful to look at. Love makes priority. Love is not the shape of a heart, love is in the form of a cross. Love isn’t a job. Love isn’t a project. Love just is. Love is who we are, love is what we do, love is perfect even though we are not perfect. Love knows no excuses. Love doesn’t live a lie. Love is a raging fire that can’t be contained, neither explained. Love is worth it all, love gives it all, love is all I want, love is all I need. Love is everything to me. Love I’m still learning. Love I’m still failing. Love you force me to keep going, even when I mess up. Love messed me up. Love is simple & complicated all at the same time. Love is tiring. Love also energizes. Love is up. Love is down. Love makes your heart pound. Love is magical. Love is passionate. Love hurts like hell. Love can feel like heaven. Love makes mistakes. Love is failing, but learning to try again. Love is willing to suffer. Love is willing to lose it all to gain it all. Love is death. Love is resurrection. Love is to die for. Love I could keep going, but I will stop here. Just love.

Things we learn from God's creations

2011-01-04T19:48:00.004+08:00

Today, the hydrangea in my house reminded me again why it's my favorite flower. Its color had changed, from last week's blueish-purple to maroon-green.

Hydrandea
a flower which my parents don't think much of
but which i insist of planting

Hydrangea
flower with ability to to change its colors
to suit the pH level of the soil
to live on under circumstances and changes
which would have killed many other flowers

Hydrangea
a name which in language of flower itself
represents 'perseverance'
reminds me of courage to face and accept changes
but most importantly
however it changes itself to suit the outside world
it never loses it's grace and beauty

Since I'm on the topic, second in line on my favorite list would be the plumeria. Used to be my favorite back in high school, before I came to know of hydrangea.

Plumeria
a flower that reminds me of simple beauty
simple joy and pureness

Third would be tulips. Even though I have never actually seen a real tulips before

Tulips
flower with three petals and three sepals
has only one flower per stem
reminds me of triangular relationship
between spouses and God

Next is the ever popular flower, roses. I believe rose is a flower that can never go wrong, in which girl in general will like. May not be on my top three list, but it's likable enough. However, I have always wished that I can see real blue roses someday. Must be quite a sight.

Truth

2011-01-03T19:30:00.005+08:00

Simply let your 'yes' be 'yes' and your 'no','no'; anything beyond this comes from the evil one. Matthew 5:37

Although vows and oaths are common, Jesus taught that our words alone should be enough if we are known as persons of our word. Truthfulness seems rare nowadays that we feel we must end our statements with 'I promise.' However, if we tell the truth at all times, we wouldn't feel the need to back our our words with oaths.

Above all, my brothers, do not swear - not by heaven or by earth or by anything else. Let your 'yes' be 'yes' and your 'no', 'no' or you will be condemned. James 5:12

Some may say that truth is often the sharpest dagger,
and lies at most times are kindness....

I want my simple words to be believable.
I will choose truth.

Similarly,
I wish I can always believe you

我的选择

2011-01-02T19:41:00.005+08:00

不懂何时
我变成了一个复杂的女生
失去了纯真，还是其实
我重来都没单纯过呢？

曾经
我渴望一段灿烂的爱情

我们一路走来
虽然没有偶像据般的烂漫
我以为我成熟了
再也不属要那初恋的滋味

当心理的需要再次被点燃
我选择了去相信会有更适合我们的人

当你告诉我一切都会不一样
我乱了

但我知道
若我现在不坚持
将来我还会不断的问自己

昨天
我发烧了
没人可诉苦
有点孤独的感觉

虽然心里难受
我也分不清心痛的原因

Prayer needs

2011-01-01T13:07:00.003+08:00

During the prayer service this week;

Pastor: So let's now break into pairs and pray for each others' prayer needs. Husbands and wives separated,k?

Mum: Okay, so what prayer needs you have? Fyp? Job placements?

Me(sheepishly): I want a car......

Mum(sweat look): You telling me or telling God?

Me: ermm... both?

hehehe...... my mum is quite cute sometimes =P

Decisions

2010-12-30T12:18:00.003+08:00

Big decisions are often not easy to make. Especially when either way can be life changing. It involves tons of thinking and fights between the heart and the mind. We may come to a decision today and to another tomorrow.

Standard advise from a fellow Christian will be to pray about it. However, even when we see signs from God and probes from the Spirit, we still doubt if we had interpret God's signals wrongly, if we had simply interpret it the way we want to or if it's simply something with no real meaning which we conveniently see it as answer from above. Lots of 'what if's'....

It's hard, especially when it involves things or people we care about deeply. Don't we just wish sometimes someone - or God will just jump right out and tell us to go right or left? That is what i had been wishing, but I know, it's a very irresponsible thought. Quoting from Aaroink;

” Well, to be completely honest and personal, I don’t believe that God will boom in his low-key voice and say, “Do exactly this,” or “Do exactly that,” and save the day. But I believe that God allows us to make our own decisions and He will give us the wisdom (our heads) and grace (our hearts) through the Holy Spirit (who is already in us) to do so."

“Trust in the LORD with all your heart, and do not lean on your own understanding.” Proverbs 3:5

Today I woke up and saw this;

So if you feel afraid and unworthy today, Jesus says, “Don’t be afraid – I’ve got a new life for you.”

And I said, 'I know' =)

Thought of the day - Communication

2010-12-26T17:32:00.010+08:00

#What's written below is purely of my own understanding and not out of any theology research.

What some people thinks:
There's no need to tell him/her what I think or how I feel. I'm sure that he/she knows, and that is what matters.

If communication and expression of love/care is not needed just because we expect the other side to know how we feel, than few things that would be totally unnecessary are prayers, praise and worship. God is knows all, of what we thinks, our deepest desire and secrets, our sins.. Why confess when He already knows what we committed? Why pray when He already knows what we want? Why tell Him how much we adore Him when He already knows?

I believe these communications help us build a personal relationship with Him. He wants us to talk to Him, just like we would a friend, a Father, to open to Him and trust Him with all we have. God made us like Him. Therefore, we need and crave just as much. Communication is a bridge that closes the gap between two persons and non-communication builds the wall that shunt people off.

Most important think ever is to love God and to love people. Thus, get connected to God and connect to people.

So it's important to say what you feel, but it's also important to mean what you say. me thinks......

Happy Birthday, Jesus

2010-12-25T16:20:00.007+08:00

When I was small, and Christmas was magical
It was a season of gifts and wonders
All I cared about was the inside
of those beautiful wrapped boxes

When I was older and knew
of that little Child born in the manger
For it me it was a heart-warming tale
Pictures of cozy hays, cute animals
bright shining stars and adoring shepherds

Only when I could understand better
what You were destined on this Earth for
slashed and whipped for our sins
a spotless Lamb, sacrificed
like a rose, trampled on the ground
to erase the wrongs on our behalf

Your birth signify something more
than Christmas tree, bells and holidays
You present to us gift of life, paid for
with Your pure and sacred blood
You snatched us from the valley of death
So we can come home to You one day

Thank You, Lord
Happy Birthday =)

Blessed Christmas, friends.
May you receive the true gift of Christmas
HuGGI3Ssss (^.^)

I'll Never Fall In Love Again

2010-12-05T11:03:00.003+08:00

What do you get when you fall in love?
A guy with a pin to burst your bubble
That's what you get for all your trouble
I'll never fall in love again
I'll never fall in love again

What do you get when you give your heart
You get it all broken up and battered
That's what you get, a heart that's shattered
I'll never fall in love again
I'll never fall in love again

sometimes, isn't it better if I just don't feel? hmmmmm

Simple or complicated?

2010-11-21T20:29:00.007+08:00

I have come to realised lately that when we're too simple, we may complicate things for people around us, which in turn complicate our life.

Perhaps world nowadays have layers underneath what we see, full of hidden meanings and reasons we may overlook with our bare eyes that people tends to neglect the possibility of simplicity.

A plain smile, just because I'm happy

A simple thank you, because I'm really grateful

A sincere apology, because I do feel sorry

A hearty conversation, because I like talking

A big bear hug, because I want/need one

A genuine friendship, because I like the way you are

I don't smile with tricks lurking in my mind

I don't thank just for the sake of it

I don't say sorry just to make you feel better

I don't make conversation that mean elsethings

I don't crave for flesh fulfillments

I don't befriend for hidden reasons

Be true to me, and you'll see what I'll do for you

One chance to my sincerity

Don't toy with my emotion

For I will not look back

However, at times

it's not enough that we understand these simplicity,

when others don't

Things are still complicated

Through valley of darkness, I shall not be afraid

2010-11-02T20:19:00.002+08:00

Dark clouds hovering over the space
blocking the moon from my sight
letting through not, a glimpse of light
pitched dark it is
with chilly winds

But I know
somewhere beyond, stars glitter
somewhere close, heart beats
somewhere inside, the Almighty still rules =)

Drowning...

2010-10-29T01:05:00.004+08:00

Water's coming at a speed I can't outrun

locked in a room

water level's increasing to levels i have to tip-toe

it will cover me completely

soon..........

Black Pearls

2010-10-21T10:55:00.003+08:00

Often on my life journey, I step on brittle glass
and cut myself
At times, I pick up pretty plastic along the way, only to
have it turn ugly on me after a while
Sometimes, I see gorgeous ice sculptures I know
not meant to be in my grasp for it will melt

Yet I thank God, because occasionally

he let me find true gems I can keep for life
Some phases of life I found ruby and quarts
others I find amethyst and jade
certain chapters of life, I find
emerald and and topaz

Here and now, I thank God again
for I think, I may have found
a pair of black pearls =)

People in life

2010-10-19T02:05:00.002+08:00

Most people pass by my life,
walking in and leaving with minimal significance

Some came into my heart,
leave their footprints but left again like most

Few impacted my life deeply,
and chose to stay to this day

Welcome to my life, I hope you stay =)

Just being silly.....

2010-10-15T11:27:00.002+08:00

I may tell the world that I don't care
Most of the time I convinced even myself
Yet at times when feelings deep down surface
I can't suppress the disappointment
of missing it again
that simple and childish experience of joy

Come, Hugs =)

2010-10-14T10:31:00.003+08:00

There are times when I just feel useless, powerless. I wish I can do something, but I dunno what to do, just in case it makes things worse. Yet, I can't just ignore it till you get over it yourself. *what a thing to do*

So I pray that God will do something. I know He will, and I know, that you know too. =)

Be still and know that You are God

2010-10-13T10:28:00.002+08:00

Sometimes, it is hard to understand
Sometimes, a lil confusing

Yet however ridiculous it may seem
I know I can trust

I'm learning to be still and listen to Your voice. At times when You speak and it did not seem to make sense to me, I'm learning to submit and surrender. End of the day, I know You'll grant me peace and joy. Nothing else matter. =)

I love You

2010-10-05T12:26:00.003+08:00

Just when I thought it is not capable of anymore tears,
there it flows, freely down the cheeks

when tears dried and all drained up
it bled

Drizzles

2010-09-25T15:40:00.003+08:00

Sky's bright, with

rays shining on the green trees

Soothing winds, chirpy birds

and

it just has to rain, suddenly

as if the weather is my mood detector

the drizzle in me

though it's not heavy with storms and lightning

and though a sure thing it is the drizzle will soon stop

drizzling it is

here and now

though I know things will get better

like that rainbow after the drizzle

that beautiful diffracted light, however

drizzling it is

here and now

Captive

2010-09-01T14:51:00.003+08:00

When will I break free?

God's Gift

2010-08-21T15:06:00.004+08:00

It's amazing sometimes, how God knows exactly what we need and desire. He knows what I need, in this monotonous life I have in UTP, the desires I have to break this boring routine. His blessing and grace is more than enough for us. It might not have been what I had in mind, perhaps not the usual shopping therapy I normally yearn for, but it's better.

The Lord blessed me in the form of Vinod, Edmund and Angie =D It was some awesome time. Thanks, guys =D and a hearty thank to our Lord, Father. Huggies ALL (^.^)

1. 2. 3. Change!

2010-07-27T18:17:00.002+08:00

This time around, I daresay I'm quite pleased with myself =)

I really can't thank God enough =D

And I pray hard hard that it stays either this way or less

Yes, I am shallow, happily so.
I'm a girl ^.^

Life is worth.....?

2010-07-01T09:29:00.005+08:00

So another young, successful and handsome Korean actor had killed himself. This is not something new in the Korean entertainment world. People are surprised, yet not that surprised. Shows how the community thinks it's a norm nowadays.

That is NOT right. Life should never be taken lightly. Life is precious. I don't mean I don't take lightly what he must have been going through. Depression can eats into a person. Yet, ending your own life should never be an option.

People are self-centered creatures. We may think we have the toughest life. PLEASE, open your eyes, mind and heart. Look around and you can find more unfortunate people striving for tomorrow.

I'm not a Jay Chou fan. But I really love the lyrics of this song. 'Dao Xiang'

對這個世界如果你有太多的抱怨
dui zhe ge shi jie ru guo ni you tai duo de bao yuan

跌倒了就不敢繼續往前走
die dao le jiu bu gan ji xu wang qian zhou

為什麼人要這麼的脆弱墮落
wei she me ren yao zhe me de cui ruo duo luo

請你打開電視看看
qing ni da kai dian shi kan kan

多少人為生命在努力勇敢的走下去
duo shao ren wei sheng ming zai nu li yong gan de zhou xia qu

我們是不是該知足
wo men shi bu shi gai zhi zu

珍惜一切就算沒有擁有
zhen xi yi qie jiu xuan mei you yong you

When you harbor endless whines and complains towards the world
When you fall and loose the guts to move forwards
Why are human such weak creatures?
Would you please on the television
and see how many are fighting courageously to move forward in life?
Shouldn't we be contented?
Appreciate everything even if you think you don't have much

R.I.P Park Yong Ha

ps. Lord, please strengthen the heart, soul and spirit of your people in this end of the time era. Amen

I am touched

2010-06-24T14:05:00.003+08:00

While news of animal testing lab is all hyped, when every other day we hear of pets abandoned, doggies put to sleep just because of mild injuries, when we can't help but question human hearts nowadays, a picture like this reminds me that someone cares and the world is not yet hopeless.

See how happy that hound-doggie looks?
It must be all the love from its master.
I'm touched, by how much he cares for this dog.

Life goes on for this brown darling. It doesn't look depressed. In fact, it's far from depressed. *what don't breaks us makes us stronger* It's an amazing sight =)

ps. if only our community cares just s much for these adorable creatures.

I love cupcakes

2010-06-22T16:08:00.005+08:00

they just make me go
'awwwwhhhhhh'

now can you help but smile back at them?

it felt like those simple satisfaction
and outright happiness of playing
SUPER MARIO

Just like that sweet sweet puppy love,ya know

Now I know life is not a bed of cupcakes

but can you give me just one?
please
pweety pweetty please?

see?
It's just as sweet
It might not have the puppy love effect
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.

but kitty love will do just fine =)

will you fight for me?

2010-06-15T16:42:00.005+08:00

will you?

got this from here

Who are we to judge?

2010-06-14T10:08:00.002+08:00

Why are human so quick to judge?
Do we get satisfaction or a sense of righteous at listing others' wrong?
Do we feel superior by labeling others a level lower to us?

How often though, have we wailed
That no one seems to understand us?
That people mistreat us?
That people spread nasty gossips unfair to us?
That some friends turned backstabber?
That we felt so alone?
Well, have we ever thought that the same girl/boy we're bitching about might be going through the same thing?
I wonder

She's right.
We know only her name, and perhaps a little of what we see with our eyes. How much more sides to her life is there that we know not of? What gives us the right to tell her she's wrong?

She's right.
We are not her. We'll never know what she went through and why she made this decision. We can encourage or advise, but who are we to decide for her? Who are we to say what she should and should not do? She has her reasons, and if she choose not to share, what right do we have to squeeze it out of her?

He's right.
Just because he's a generally nice person does not make him a saint! Emotion is a part of human being, and just because he lost his temper ONCE, does not make him a bad tempered person with no sportsmanship.

He's right.
Just because he's young and successful at young age, does not mean he's from a well off family, fed off from gold spoon since day one on Earth. Btw, what if he is? Why the bother? Why are human so bitter about others' success, determine to find loophole that he did not make the money himself? If one's so eager to comment, then please search thoroughly on his childhood before doing so.

She's right.
Kind and generous does not equals to a doormate, and not helping people on every request presented to her does not mean she's not kind.

And there are these about her, her, him, them, her, him and many more.
We do not know what happened in their lives. Do not add salt to their wound. If we have no good things to say, and be content with our mouths shut!

Especially on relationships, be it friends or couples. If we are not a party involved, then we will NEVER know for sure what exactly happen. I wouldn't go so far as to say there's o right and wrong. I believe there IS right and wrong in a relationship, but we shall never know for sure, who's right and who's wrong. If our friend is involved, it's natural to be one sided, however, be a comfort, but not a a decision maker. It's not our decision to make.

I'm definitely no better than anyone else. When juicy gossip turns my way, hard to resist isn't it? ;P This post serves as a reminder to me and anyone else who reads, I guess =)

1#.Senseless

2010-06-10T14:12:00.002+08:00

One thing I don't understand is why people like to say this.

Some ppl: You're not going to finish your food?
Me: Full dy la.

Them: Such a waste. Not nice meh?
Me: Full dy. Will be bloated if I keep eating. You eat la.

Them: You finish your own food la. Think of the people in Africa.

Question of the day,
even if I finish my food, how does it help those people? They feel full if I'm bloated? ishhhh...

heartbreaking

2010-06-07T13:41:00.002+08:00

Sent an email to my supplier, and this came back. So disheartening >.<

Just in case it's too small to be read, here's what it says

"Today is our replacement holiday in Malaysia. I will be back to office on tomorrow, 8 June 2010."

why my company don't have? why? why? why?

Beautiful Sleep, Wonderful Dreams =D

2010-06-04T08:44:00.006+08:00

I'll know that I'm sleeping normal again, if I start having bizarre dreams. Different than the stressful ones, that are just imitations of my daytime work, my weird dreams often have me wake up in wonder and feeling rather good, even though I have numerous different dreams the whole night.

The night after a dreamt of Fu Hai Feng playing basketball,
*no, i didn't get my wish of seeing Cai Yun =(*

I dreamt that I was CD shopping with my dad
and we bumped into Aaron Kwok 0.0
he was just browsing in the shop
looking something like this

well, minus that gay-looking purse
we gave him a look, a mild interest
and continue with our shopping
as if seeing Aaron Kwok in a CD shop is the most normal thing
Then he suddenly approach us, and asked if we're from Sibu!! *wow*
and he said one of his grandparents is a foochow from Sibu *WOW*
we casually said yes, and he happily told us he that
he was so glad he bumped into someone that felt like relative
and gave my dad RM100 (0.o) *yes, it's RM*
and I woke up
HAHAHAhaha

*********************************************************************
Last night
I dreamt of something more adventurous
i was part of a trio that do evil creature hunting
going through dungeons and dark forests
there was another gal and another guy
this gal likes this guy
this guy likes this gal too
but had no idea the gal likes him
and this gal thought this guy likes me
*now i think my brain was influenced by edrea's neighbour story*

one thing leads to another
the gal 'merajuk' and ran off
jumps down a hole *like alice in wonderland hole*
panicked, we followed suit
down and down we went
it was such a long fall
we had time to discuss things (=.=')
and i advised the guy to tell the gal his feelings

awaiting for us when we landed
was what I think is the China badminton team (o.o)
the gal was with them
i pushed the guy towards her
saw that 2 of my uni friends made the team
*cherng dong and his gf*

the rest of the team was cocky
called me a rookie
*i'm suddenly part of the china badminton team too*
and unwilling to accept my participation in the team

then this guy walked to me
LIN DAN!!!!!
introduced himself
comforted me not to mind them
offered me to train with him and his gf
to brush up my skills
*so diff from his real life impressions,kan? haha (^0^)*

suddenly
we were in a tournament
make no mistake my next few sentences
we're China badminton team
playing in badminton tournament
a World Cup, in fact
in Africa!! *lolsssss*

but coach still don't let me play
sad sad
and I woke up =P

ps. this post is written mainly just to entertain myself in the future
pps. but to keep you all entertained, here's a pic of Lin Dan 'making face' when he was frustrated over a ridiculous line call =D

me think cute+funny =P
you think?

Dreams

2010-06-02T09:14:00.002+08:00

Last night, I dreamed of Fu Hai Feng.
Wearing a badminton shirt in that color he's seen with so often.
The gold-yellow/bright yellow
looking so good
striving for every opportunity
to shoot a goal! *sounds wrong now?*

dreamed of him playing basketball
opposing MY team...
and with every goal he shoot
I cheered
~cold looks from my coach~

haizzz... guess dream or real life, I'm still the same ^0^

Cai Yun - Fu Hai Feng
Cai-Fu to the officials
Feng-Yun to the fans
They are so real
Every sweat, every tears
Every laughter, every smile
Every loss, every disappointment
Every victory, every peaks
In face of adversity
Everything is so genuine

Have been a fan since 2005
and will remain to be for many many years =)

God, let my see Cai Yun tonight
don't mind even if it's golf he's playing
Pretty pweety please????
=P

I realise that

2010-05-25T16:33:00.002+08:00

I'm captivated mostly by a song's lyrics and not its melody
I remember a song by its lyrics

When I try to recall a song;
give me the opening lyric and 99% i will recall the whole song
give me 1st verse's tune and I'll give you a blank look

Here's one of my all time favorite

Dekat padaMu itu rinduku
Setiap kataku Kau pun menuggu
Tak kusangka, kutemukan Satu kasih yang abadi
Kini kudatang, dan kubawa hidupku

ps. I miss tamborine dancing with Diane

梦开始的原点 where dream was first found

2010-05-21T19:59:00.004+08:00

There is currently a song that I love to bits. The lyrics touched my heart deeply. This song is sang by a china singer, I guess. Below is the lyric.I try to translate it the best I can, but the mandarin version is so much more beautiful and touching.


Singer: 薛之谦
Lyrics：陈耀川
Composer：薛之谦
Song Title:梦开始的原点


一步一步和自己追逐
没有极限的路途
终点在不远处
时间已开始倒数
记分牌上清楚的写着
我得到的分数
我不得不承认
我已付出了全部
Step by step I race against myself
on an endless route
destination is somewhere within grasp
the countdown has started
the scoreboard shows clearly
scores I've made so far
I have to admit
I've give it my all


就让我的心回到
梦开始的原点
有多少白天黑夜
忍着眼泪流着汗水
我坚持走到今天
我愿用生命表演
成败与得失之间
告诉自己坦然面对
就算我最后只能带着微笑流着泪水
我已经尽力而为
我可以无怨无悔
Let me return to the time
when dream was first found
countless days and nights of
resisting the flows of tears with my sweats
I've come this far
willing now to perform with my life

win and defeat, gain and loss
i told myself to face it take it as it is
even if at the end I can only smile with tears flowing
I have tried my best
I have no regrets


已经忘了桌上的日历
翻过多少辛苦
对自己说我不在乎
不到最后我不认输
记分牌上清楚的写着
我完成的记录
我不得不承认
我以付出了全部
I have forgotten the calender on the desk
how much records of hardship it bears
I told myself 'it's alright'
that I fight till the end
the scoreboard shows clearly
records of my past journeys
I have to admit
I have give it my all


这一刻我让记忆回到梦开始的原点
有多少白天黑夜
忍着伤痛流着汗水
就怕输赢的关键
我还是差了一点
成败与得失之间
告诉自己坦然面对
就算我最后只能带着微笑流下泪水
感动已装满心田
我早已无怨无悔
At this moment, let me return
to when dream was first found
countless of days and nights
resisting tears flowing with my sweats

Fear that the thin line between victory and defeat
I needed just that lil bit more in me
between gain and loss
I told myself to face it as it is
even if I have to smile with tears in the end
Hearts have been touched
I have no more regrets

我早已无怨无悔
I have no more regrets

How many of us can actually say, we have no regrets?

sleepless nights

2010-05-20T08:23:00.002+08:00

For 1 - 2 weeks, I had a good natural sleeping routine alert system. Perhaps due to the increased workload, I started feeling sleepy at 10pm++ and by 11.30pm max, I'll be sleeping soundly through the night. Then I'd wake up the next morning a few minutes before my alarm ring feeling fresh and anew.

This week, perhaps also due to increased hour in front of the lappie, my brain is in such a full swing that it refused to shut down at night. I don't feel sleepy at night when I off my light at 11.40pm++, had hard time going to sleep with so many things going through my mind and when I wake up in the morning, I felt like I hadn't really slept. Tired and sleepy.

However, once I clean up, had breakfast and walk to work, my brain's occupied with countless of things that by the time I reach office, it's already fully activated. Brain's more than ready to work, while my heart's beating wearily. Good or bad? haizzz

High ^0^

2010-05-19T13:48:00.002+08:00

I think I have yet to come back to Earth after Thomas Cup. My brain's catching up on all the lost years and my heart can't contain the emotional rush. I feel emo and high almost all the time.

Kinda geram I eventually stopped following badminton news after I went to UTP. Now I go through their highs and lows in such a speed I can experience sadness, happiness and bursting pride over and over in 1 night @.@

I know no one's interested, but my next few posts will most probably consist of continuous reports of them over the years. Will be super happy if any of you like this sharing, else, well it's for my own record =)

Kids Nowadays - Facebook

2010-05-09T12:03:00.000+08:00

I saw this on my 7-year-old niece's facebook, and I find it very cute. =P

One of the most frequent shout out/wall post we see among our peers would be

'Final!!! die liao'

'So many assignments and tests together. OMG @.@'

'How's studies? Doing ok? o the best!'

'How's work nowadays? Boss ok?'
.
.

Now, what would a 7-year-old say?

ROTFL. Cute =))))))

Kids nowadays...................

Sorrow ends

2010-05-07T09:59:00.004+08:00

For months, I was very unhappy. In fact, I've never been more depressed. I wake up in dread every day and go to sleep feeling stressed about the next day every Sunday night. Happiest moment is when the clock strike 6pm on Friday night, and for a few hours, I feel released. However, upon waking up on Saturday morning, I dread for Monday again. Yea, that was how bad my Monday blues were.

However, things had taken a better change since the last few weeks. Now I feel happy almost everyday. Even if I'm not happy, at least I look forward to everyday. I'll tell you why.

Let's start with Monday.

Monday
Because it marks a new week and that means another week down/nearer to the end of my internship.

Tuesday
Because it's one day nearer to Friday.

Wednesday
Refer to the answer above.

Thursday
I know today will past very fast and when I go to sleep this night, it'll be Friday when I wake up.

Friday
It's Friday! Need I say more?

Saturday
I can meet my bf/friends/sister or just go out and pamper myself. Feels good =) Plus going to church whenever I'm in PJ and going makan-makan with church members after service.

Sunday
Same as above minus the church and plus I know that when I wake up the next day, weeks left to my internship will minus one!

Zha Dou???? Kek Tiok?? =P But seriously, I feel more happy than relaxed when I keep up this kind of attitude. Of course, a big part is also try as much as I can not to worry and leave things in God's hands.

Although my reasons for being happy sounds kinda lame, but I do progress better now that my mood is lifted. So all in all, things are better now =)

LMAO

2010-04-29T17:24:00.002+08:00

Worst tragic that could happen, ever.......

I think I better stick to lol

LOLSSSSsssss

Surrender and be free

2010-04-23T13:50:00.005+08:00

What does it really mean to let God decide everything?
I thought I surrendered
Why am I still so worried about so many things?

I'm worried

Worried about the outcome of my internship
Worried of possibilities of not getting an A
Worried that it the A- internship grade will ruin my life
Worried of it ruining my first class chances
Worried about not getting employed by Petronas
Worried about getting employed by Petronas and not doing something I like
Worried about what to say in my future interview
*which is more than a year away!*
Worried about my life not going as planned
Basically worried about my whole life now

Why?
I thought I surrendered
After the crush in form five
I knew that God knows best
Surrendered
I survived the crush
In fact, I had a great time in UTM

All these perhaps, because have gained
I thought I will be wiser
I thought I can now manage
Much gain, much fear to be lost

I'm starting all over
Mentality of when I was in high school
Planning my whole life ahead
Trying to take control of everything
Things that I have no control over
I walked ahead of God, into path unknown to myself
Tugging at God at times, to follow me instead
*I really AM a boar!*

All I have now is Petronas scholarship
and possibility of being employed by Petronas

Already I'm depressed to the core,
by my own thoughts and pride

How am I to manage all else God plan to give me?

What does it mean to let God decide?
Perhaps I should live today as it is
Let tomorrow be what God's will to be
Let the future unveil itself at God's time
Stop planning, stop leading
Time to turn back and receive His outreach hand
Let Him lead

I love you, Lord.

Irony is that, the post was not supposed to be about this at all. I was about to write about a new friend, who's mid twenty and has the mentality of high school girls. Somehow it quickly brought me down my own memory lane, and realised I have no right to judge her mentality at all. I thought I matured, now I realised how much I have back-slided. Much catching up to do. Thank you,Lord.

Dreams and Reflections

2010-04-20T08:25:00.002+08:00

As I was about to wake up this morning, right before the alarm went off, perhaps, I dreamt that it was the last 10 minutes of work that day. Vivid clear was a big, round clock that showed with its short hand almost to 6 and its long hand at 10.

What an irony. How disappointing.

Now I seriously believe we dream what we feel. There are still a lot of other unexplained dream though. Swimming is just one of the 3 most frequent dream. The other 2, I'll get into that next time.

Underwater......

2010-04-19T09:06:00.004+08:00

Last night, I again dreamt of swimming. It had been getting more and more frequent to dream of myself in the water. Sometimes, I was in a hotel's pool, swimming to and fro rapidly. Sometimes, I was underwater, but found myself amazingly capable of breathing underwater. Occasionally, I was swimming against the waves in the sea, struggling to an unknown place.

This time, I was swimming along the coast, escaping from one side of an island to the other side. It was raining heavily, and all I knew was to get away, as if something was chasing me. I saw a big iron gate in a distance, I didn't know how I got there, but swim I did. I climbed over the gate and landed myself in a normal-looking primary school. The only weird thing is that everywhere seemed to be wet and even in the classrooms, rain dripped through the roofs but class went on undisturbed, neither by the rain nor by my presence.

As I have dreamt so much of swimming lately, I got curious and actually looked up the dream encyclopedia. According to it, when a person dream of swimming, it usually means trying to take control of oneself emotionally, or undergoing a big emotional change. I guess this makes sense as almost everyday I need to prepare myself for work and telling myself over and over again that I don't hate my work, assuring myself countless time that this is good for me and basically trying to hypnotize myself into liking it. Guess I can expect myself more swimming sessions in my dream....

The Gang.Com

2010-04-11T09:12:00.001+08:00

Random things I've come to forget, revived again while browsing through The Gang's blog.

1. Karen and I are sooo bloody 'rou-ma'. *chilly~~*

2. There was this thing called Neopets. Sorta remember I had 2 pets there.

3. Merlvyn was mentioned in 90% of my posts. OMG.

4. My face looked so distorted last time.

5. Fui Tze wrote ONE very interesting entry. haha

6. Karen was the most active blogger. *WOW*

7. Lots of dark secret inside. *Shhhhh*

8. We were so dungu in getting around KL. *sakai-nya*

9. We were such semangat, energetic bunch of people. Now so laid back. *old dy?*

10. We actually planned our meet up in KLCC. Lolss... of all place. =P

11. Karen said: 'If you want to be successful in life, trust me, don't play DoTA' this really tickles me, I dunno why =P

12. I actually pestered Karen for a testimonial on Friendster. =____='

13. I suddenly became much closer to Liaw at one time during diploma, when I needed constant comforting. *why i'm such a baby? 0.o* but then... *thanks, gal. Hugs*

14. Edrea revived the gang's blog during her intern. =)

15. via tried her best to be active(I think), and wrote, erm, 3 entries? *haha XD*

conclusion,
I LOVE you guys. HuGGi3Ssssssss

0.o

2010-04-09T08:22:00.003+08:00

I used to buy the smallest size available for my facial wash/toner/body shampoo.

I used to pour generous amount of body shampoo on my palm and carelessly let them drip while i wash myself.

I used to pull out toilet paper, as much/as long as my hand can stretch for each use.

I used to pour lots of oatmeal/milo/cereal into my cup and throw them away if I can't finish them.

.........................all these because I LOVE the thrill of going shopping for new ones when they finish

Now, I cant do that anymore

Now, last few drops of facial wash can last me probably another fortnight.

Now, body shampoo is carefully poured on a sponge and spread across myself by scrubbing the sponge.

Now, I think of how much toilet paper I need and take accordingly.

Now, I take half the serving of previous oatmeal/cereal and add only when I still crave them.

.........................all these because I'm BROKE

broke
totally broke
broke

I know what it taste like now to not earn enough to support myself
It thoroughly sucks

I'm broke

Smile alwiz =)

2010-03-27T20:51:00.003+08:00

Dwelling in your presence
for reasons unexplainable perhaps to those who have never experience it
a smile is carved on my week-long of stern lips
an urge to laugh and cry at the same time
feeling so good
just so good
so good
knowing that everything is all right
will be all right
burden-less feeling even when things are falling apart
just dwelling in you is all I need
to have a smile

This is the joy of knowing You =)

My New Baby =)

2010-03-26T09:10:00.006+08:00

Ok, I'm not photography expert, so instead of taking zillions of artistic pictures of it myself from every angle and pose possible, I decided to just download the pictures from google image ;P

The LG Kf300, pink

Ain't it gorgeous?

I actually searched high and low(literally, in 1 building la) for the
purple version of it, but one shop only has red, one only has pink and most
only have black(Booo~~Ringgg)

So pink it is ^o^

I love everything about it, goes really well with the Daisy Duck hp hanger =)
*is that even a reason? 0.o*

The keypad extremely comfy, and it's really user friendly.
Lots of shortcut buttons.

The only ONE and very SERIOUS downside,
the battery don't last very long.
About 3 hours talktime? >.< me ="(">

Ponders...........

2010-03-15T10:23:00.003+08:00

I seriously don't like working(from current experience), but I prefer working to studying.

I really enjoy study life(minus the 1st month of depression in UTP), but I still prefer working to studying.

Does this make sense to any of you?

Luckily, Amoi assured me that it's not because I'm money-faced. Well, not the sole reason, at least.

Hope I can find myself a likable job in future, so life will be more fulfilling =)

如果

2010-03-13T22:07:00.001+08:00

This is somewhat inspired by a videoclip ' ', although it was of a totally different topic. Please pardon my very amateur mandarin. I'm sorry if I used any characters wrongly.

我相信,人類最想的到的果應該是如果吧，

對于往事的遺憾；

如果當時我董事一點

如果我再努力一些

如果我多愛他一點

如果我當時收好一點

如果我早一點到

à什么什么就不會發生了

對于當下的埋怨還有將來的可望；

如果天氣可以涼一點

如果我的房子再大一點

如果我的攻潛多一點

如果我的車子快一點

如果我長的漂亮一點

如果我發財了 =.=’

如果我結婚了

如果我出名了

à 我就可以或能夠什么什么了

如果好像可以帶來無數的希望和可能性(給第二種的人)

同時也帶來了痛苦和折磨(給第一種的人)

很多人都抱這如果過日子

也有人因為如果而害怕

對于將來的當心;

如果他不愛我了

如果我死了

如果我東西被偷了

如果我段了腿或手

à 我以后該這么辦呢?

為什么我們都不能好好的以眼前所看到的,所擁有的,所發生的滿足快樂的走下去呢? 在我能控制之下我選擇不要這么累的活。你呢？

I wanna migrate to Hong Kong =)

2010-03-12T14:00:00.005+08:00

Do you know that Hong Kong has declare 2 days of public hols for Christmas?

Well, I just found out. Keat How used to claim that Malaysia probably has the most public hols with all the different races celebration. So one day, it struck my mine to check the international calender and find out other country's public hols.

It's true that most countries only have about 10 public hols a year. Malaysia on the other hand, has 15, including those state-selective public hols like Good Friday, Deepavali etc.

However, Hong Kong has 17!! That's not the best part. Best part is it has 4 days for CNY and 2 days for Christmas. Not even England/Australia/US/Canada has 2 days for Christmas. This is so rock!! hehe....

I've always love Hong Kong, even though I've never set foot there.

Hopefully I will, end of this year. During Christmas!! haha..

Plus Hong Kong has Lam Fung

Lam Fung --> that's a definite bonus.. hahaha

Or so we think........

2010-03-05T15:59:00.009+08:00

I had this conversation with a lecturer last sem, whom I bug with every little problem occurred on my ETP's little circuit board.

Me: Wow, how do you know there's problem there? Is that supposed to influence this?

Him: We know it's not supposed to cause problem. But experience tells me this occur when you do that.

Me: Then how am I supposed to debug if problem comes from a place not supposed to have problem? Debug everything?

Him: Yes, debug everything, for now. When you're experienced, you'll know where to look for illogical bug.

Me: @.@

How true. Now what the heck is wrong with my PCB?? When did Wiegand wire is heard of causing false trigger? Problem found and solved. But why?????? Either illogical things do happen in science, or our brain is still too limited to understand.

Bleak

2010-03-04T08:43:00.004+08:00

It's just a long dark tunnel.

The only difference it makes when I advance is that it gets smaller with each step, leaving me more suffocated. There's no turning back, there's no light up front either. Stagnant is not a choice.

Therefore, suffocate myself it is......

Post CNY - Was/Is/Will be

2010-02-22T15:24:00.005+08:00

Flight to Kuching - was - much anticipated
Chinese New Year - was - fantastic
Visiting - was - ecstatic
The Gang - was/is - as wonderful as ever
Kuching/homecook food - was - luscious
Parents - were - superb
Karaoke - was - mind-blasting (Shirlene Ng you are sooo damn good!!)

Flight to KL - was - dreaded
Valentines make up - was - sweet
Drives - were - fruitful
Tour to Batu Cave - was - funny =P
Ikea - was - packed! but yummy
Sunday - was - not very welcomed
Monday morning - was - cursed @.@

Walk to work - was - too short
Holiday - was - to short
Time with The Gang/family/bf - was - too short

Heart - is - heavy
Brain - is - away
Body - is - feeling empty
Energy - is - absent

Tomorrow - will be - slightly better
The weekend - will be - great, I hope =)

Clak-dok clak-dok..................

2010-02-03T17:35:00.003+08:00

After more than 2 months of intern, one thing that I've really learn to master is,
....................................
................................
.........................
..................
............
......
...
.

recognizing the sound made by my boss's and sv's footsteps!!!!
so I can quickly switch the windows back to mplab from facebook/blogs/thestar/u-name-it

ZZzzzzzzzz =______='

What is true love?

2010-01-29T09:14:00.003+08:00

While browsing through thestar.com this morning, I came across this headline.

'Bare your love this Valentine’s Day, female students urged.'

Attracted by the topic, especially since Valentine's celebration in university is often non-existent and discouraged, I clicked on it, interested to see what it has to say. and by the time I finish the 1st paragraph, I was thoroughly disgusted.

SHAH ALAM: Female students in higher-learning institutes here are being persuaded not to wear panties on Valentine’s Day as an expression of true love for their boyfriends. more

When they say the students are urged to bare their love, I didn't expect that it's exactly what they are asked to do, literally. One question though,

What the heck does this have to do with true love!?

Me - Si Pencuri Siber ^.^

2010-01-21T09:30:00.004+08:00

I can't help but curi this pic from someone else's blog. Hope she don't mind. No, I hope she don't find out. wakakaka. Because this pic seriously reminds me of another pic, how cliche our photo taking skills are, which kinda amuse me. I bet there are hundreds other couple photos like this @.@

Cally & Aaron (my uni-mates)
number of times we exchange words - non. @.@

Below is the pic it reminds me of.

Too bad kh's smiling. *next time take pic, cool abit ma* =P

Or take weird/imaginative pic like this.

~*love*~ this pic

Bitching..............

2010-01-20T10:43:00.004+08:00

Feeling fat lately. I spend about 10secs everyday feeling depressed about how big my belly is now. For that 10secs(usually when I take off my shirt to change into pyjama at night, i just can't help standing straight + look down to see how much of my feet I still can see), I feel like those overweight girls in drama that wallow in self-pity while stuffing handfuls of ships down her throat, well I believe you get the idea.

So yesterday, I decide to go swimming after work. I was damn semangat ok, went to check out the pool right after I reached home. 5 meters from the pool, I saw lots of blacks splashing about. *stop on the spot,turn around, walk back upstairs*

Ok, I have nothing against the black. Honest. At least, they're so much better than the P**@$T$#. But I just don't like being chat up randomly(which the blacks tend to do ALOT), especially by sucky pick up line like 'apa khabar? boleh saya duduk? apa nama kamu?'.

Ok, it's not that sucky, but it irritates me when the internationals try to impress me with their BM. Next time someone say 'apa khabar' to me, I shall say

'Bu hao yi shi, wo zhi hui jiang hua yu!'

I'm so bad~~~~ growing fat syndrome....... ^.^

3rd yr 1st sem - satisfying =)

2010-01-18T17:29:00.004+08:00

Thank you Lord,

For the result you gave me last sem. It is just as I hoped/aimed, not more, not less. Of course I wouldn't have mind a better grade,(who would?), but this gpa is just what I had declared I would be satisfied with, and so I am. =)

Dear DSP,

I can't believe how good you are to me. Dengan dukacitanya though, I have to tell you that we definitely can't go on. The problem is definitely with me. You see, I happen to love MicroC more although she doesn't think much of me at the moment. I'm confident I can change her mind. =) However, I will tell people how wonderful you are. Thank you for not holding grudges.

Lots of love,
~~~me~~~

Will you accept His application?

2010-01-15T09:33:00.004+08:00

Something I found while I browse through blogs which I find rather interesting and touching. When Jesus says that He knocks and waits outside the door of our hearts, He is that humble. Heck, He even sends out CV(all those leaflets) when we reject Him point blank. He seeks every way of reaching us, wishing to grant us abundant life. How any of us are willing to sign Him a life contract with immediate effect?

Jesus' CV
My name is Jesus - The Christ. many call me Lord! I've sent you my CV because I'm seeking the top management position in your heart. Please consider my accomplistment as set forth in my CV.

Qualifications

I founded the Earth and establish the heavens, (See Proverbs 3:19)

I formed man from dusts on the ground, (See Genesis 2:7)

I breathed into man the breath of life, (See Genesis 2:7)

I redeemed man from the curse of law, (See Galatians 3:13)

The blessings of the Abrahamic Covenant comes upong your life through me, (See Galatians 3:14)

Occupational Background

I've only had one employer, (See Luke 2:49)

I've never been tardy, absent, disobedient, slothful or disrespectful.

My employer has nothing but rave reviews for me, (See Matthew 3:15-17)

Skills and Work Experience

Some of my skills and work experience include: empowering the poor to be poor no more, healing the brokenhearted, setting the captives free, healing the sick, restoring sight to the blind and setting at liberty those that are bruised, (See Luke 4:18)

I am a Wonderful Counselor, (See Isaiah 9:6).

People who listen to me shall dwell safely and shall not fear evil, (See Proverbs 1:33)

Most imprtantly, I have the authority, ability and power to cleanse you off your sins, (see John 1:7-9)

Educational Background

I encompass the entire breadth and length of knowledge, wisdom and understanding, (See Proverbs 2:6)

In me are hid all the treasures of wisdom and knowledge, (See Colossians 2:3)

My Word is so powerful, it has been described as being a light unto your feet and lamp unto your path, (See Psalms 119:105)

I can even tell you all of the secrets of your heart, (See Psalms 44:21)

Major Accomplishments

I was an active participan in the the greatest Summit meeting of all times, (See Genesis 1:26)

I laid down my life so that you may live, (See II Corinthians 5:15)

I defeated the archenemy of God and mankind and made a show of them openly, (See Colossians 2:15)

I miraculously fed the poor, healed the sick and raised the dead! There are many more major accomplisments, too many to mention here. you can read them on my website which is located and www dot - the BIBLE. You don't need an internet connection or computer to access my website.

References

Believers and followers worldwide will testify to my divine healings, salvation, deliverance, miracles, restoration and supernatural guidance.

In Summation

Now that you've read my CV, I'm confident that I'm the only candidate uniquely qualified to fill this vital position in your heart.

In summation, I will properly direct your paths, (See Proverbs 3:5-6), and lead you into everlasting life, (See John 6:47)

When can I start?

Thou Shalt Look Presentable, Always....

2010-01-11T08:52:00.004+08:00

It was Sunday

I woke up at 10am, but due to the little temptress called 'bed', I got up only at 12pm when my tummy started growling.

Cleaning myself, and with my hair still looking half like a bird's nest, I went downstairs for lunch in my house clothes. (I'm currently staying in a condo, there're restaurants on the 1st few floors)

Why dress up when i'm just walking a few steps out the house?

SO WRONG!!

There, I ordered bitter gourd and chicken cooked with black bean.

Finished my lunch, feeling contented, with flakes of black beans stuck in between my teeth, I walked to the cashier.

I walked past a familiar figure, but couldn't quite put the picture together.

He must have felt the same, for we turned looking at each other at the same time.

OMG!

Someone I haven't seen for years and years, 4 or 5 at least. Last time I saw him he wast probably 16, or 15 - 'dao deng'

He's sooo much better looking now, grinning at me in his best Sunday clothes perhaps.

I felt so 'ah ma' in my oversized T and baggy shorts, ruffled hair and black beans in my teeth. = ='

Tuned out..............

2009-12-29T13:48:00.004+08:00

Feeling tuned out
Not in the mood for anything?

I don't dislike the work
Definitely much nicer than studying
I'm doing work I kind of like
So what is that tugging reluctance to come to work?

KH says:

it's the low pay
Well, honestly, if a day's absence will cost me RM100++ then I wouldn't dream of skipping
In fact, earning that amount per day will have me wake up everyday with smiles on my faces

it's because I had too much fun with him during the weekend
Quite true
I came back very late on Sun
Woke up on Mon morning with weird feelings that I shouldn't be working yet

Haih....
Now my aim is to be rich enough to retire at 30

Realistic onot?

And We Live Happily Ever After Without Each Other

2009-11-19T09:31:00.003+08:00

Dear DSP,

It had been nice, knowing you. A pleasant journey with personal growth on my part. Our last date was satisfying enough, but some things are just not meant to be, you know? No hard feelings,k? We shall separate in peace.

Sincerely..........
me

Relationship status: It's complicated

2009-11-18T02:56:00.005+08:00

Dear DSP,

Looking back, I have known you for almost 5 months. We have been through a lot, there were ups and downs. It is true that I have neglected you at times, unwilling to spend some time with you due to some other temptations. But you must know that deep down, I really do love you, and would love to know you more. So please, can you stop being so mysterious and playing hard to get?

Tomorrow is the fateful day, to test our relationship. I hope we survive it.

Of a brittle glass and me

2009-11-15T00:22:00.004+08:00

Dear Brittle Glass,

I have no idea why the cut from your broken pieces still sting at odd times, especially when people insist on discussing it, and I have to pretend that I don't care. The frequency is dropping though, and I hope the day will come when I can really laugh the whole thing off.

sincerely,
me

Of gems and the fakes

2009-11-13T01:21:00.003+08:00

Just because something looks pretty and reflects light does not mean that it is a gem.

Just because it captures and traps the beautiful rainbow does not mean that it's a crystal.

It can be a brilliant work of glass, pretending it's worth more than just that

It can be a cleverly made plastic, meant to imitate the look of a diamond's every beauty

Or it can be a luminous sculpture of ice, mesmerizing but will melt to nothing in my grasp

I guess you're a little of all

A wonderful carved piece of perhaps the highest quality of brittle glass

Pleasant to the eyes of many, a proud possession I seem to have, but I alone know the value you hold

Not very much

An old amethyst may not look as radiant

a ruby might not sparkle as you do

an aquamarine might not have the crystal-clear beauty you possess

but they're true and real

and will not change through time and trials

I love my gems

Congrats, ETP 42!!!

2009-10-26T21:15:00.003+08:00

Thank God for guiding us into EDX.
Thank God for bringing us through the evaluation.
Thank God for the silver.
Thank God for bringing us together as a group.

You guys rock!!! I wouldn't want any other members. It had been great being in a group with you all.

Will put up you pics when i have them =P

Missing the warmth of one's embrace.

2009-10-19T02:34:00.006+08:00

A picture so beautiful, yet
so sad

without you.

Feeling a little cold, as I look over the cliff.
It's so beautiful
so mesmerizing
But what exactly is the value
When I'm there standing cold?

When was the last time we lied on the grass?
The last time we looked at the stars together?
When was the last time I smelt your after-shower?
Or you gently entangle my hair?

The lake

2009-10-17T21:52:00.003+08:00

Am I toying with fire?

I see the surface of the lake.
It's calm, with hints of breeze
Dragonflies tips playfully on it
It reflects still a smiling face of me

Am I stirring the water from beneath far beyond the surface?
Is it the root I'm starting a havoc at?
How much can it take before tranquility is disrupted?
How much more, before mud pollute the clear?

Or is it all just in my head?
Dreams of the green grass will always be a dream the lake don't reflect
when I look deep into the depth.

This is why I love him... =)

2009-09-29T15:18:00.005+08:00

Sha Zhu's attempt at cooking?
Can cut properly or not oh?

Ooooh..... mushroom
Cook what ah?

Eggssssss
A must have if you're cooking to please me =)

Start cooking la~~~~

Hmmmm...
About done

So prepared, got red wine somemore =P

Yummy~~~~
It's creamy, and the sausages were heavenly.

Thanks, Sha Zhu. I had a great meal =)
.
.
.
.
.
.

Happy 3rd anniversary to us ^.^

*Sorry dear, I post it a little late. More than 10 days late in fsact. huhu... still, thankssssssssssss =)

If you are a girl.............

2009-09-16T21:03:00.005+08:00

Sometimes,
I kinda wish that you're a girl.

Sometimes,
you make me so happy I feel like hugging you.

Sometimes,
you're such a comfort I feel like leaning on your shoulder.

Sometimes,
when I'm so lost and you seem so sure, I feel like holding your hands.

Sometimes,
I'm so comfortable with you that though it seemed wrong, it felt so right.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
Thank you for walking with me through these few long and hell-ish days.
It meant a lot to me that you cared.

I thank God for the day He made you.
You are a blessing to those around you. =)

These are my existing sweeties..... (minus the 2 guys)

Welcome to the gang!!!

Now we are 'ji mui' ^.^

You're so gonna strangle me when you see this =P

added on 26th Sept, 2009;

I would like to thank you again for the trouble you went through helping me this time around. I dunno how to express it, and I dunno what else to say but thank you =) God bless.... cheers ^.^

Just keeping it safe for the time being.........

2009-09-15T12:50:00.004+08:00

Today, I took the ring down from my finger and wear it instead on my necklace. Without the feel of that stainless steel's coldness between my fingers, it felt a little odd. Although it is no longer there, where it had rested for the past year, it will still be near to my heart. And I believe firmly that someday, it will go back to where it belongs.

Playing with my bare fingers, I realised that I have not fully recovered from the injury I got from basketball weeks ago. Like you know fully well, yes, I have been neglecting it, not applying medicine to it like I should. Perhaps tonight, before bed, I will put some oilment to it.

I spent most of the time in class today wondering how you're doing in class. I have to keep reminding myself why we made this decision. At a phase where we could no longer go forward nor turn back, we had to do something. Reading your blog made me feel so sorry that I put you through so much pain. But like you said, I believe in what the future holds.

Just want to let you know, in the only way I know how.........

2009-09-14T21:27:00.005+08:00

It doesn't make much sense to me that I seem to miss you more today. For the first time in many weeks, I actually wonder what you have been doing, how has your day been and if you're okay.

Going through classes, getting on with life, I realised just how much things I had wanted to tell you. I've started on the project Mr Patrick gave me. It's not easy. I was bitten by an insect today. It stings. Khairani played with Shan Shan few days ago. It annoyed me. I am somehow more protective of it than of Xixi and Lele. I don't know why I didn't tell you then.

Nothing make sense to me. Yes, I still believe that this decision was necessary, I just didn't know that it'll hurt this much.

I miss this gal...................

2009-09-06T17:26:00.002+08:00

Miss doing silly things with her....... =P

I don't think I know you

2009-08-27T23:37:00.006+08:00

I don't understand. I guess I never will.

Once, a friend asked if I would ever consider you as the special one, I firmly said no with the reason that it's pathetic to fight for your attention with the square box that sits in front of you all day. The one you'll never get tired of seeing, the you'll always pay full attention to when in your companion, the one who sits firmly in that important place in your heart. No, I decided then it would be damn sad that you should give more time to it than me.

Later I thought you changed. I was moved and accepted you. You were so gentle, always full of ideas and laughter. You claimed to give it all up for me. I was the happiest girl on Earth, or so I thought. Real naive of me. That square box remains the only thing you're interested in, the one you won't even let me touch at times, and the one who cause you to brush my hands irritably away on occasions. What is this? Aren't guys supposed to be abit more outdoor? Or am I destined to seek for activities companions myself while you indulge in your own cyber world?

It annoys me, your lack of interest in the world and in general knowledge. It annoys me that you hide behind the language barrier you built yourself. It annoys me that you keep asking for time and I see nothing. It annoys me that you don't have a goal to move forward to.

I know what you're capable of. I was so proud of you. I know you have good attention span, which is not reserved for me. You want only to see me when you're in the mood. I guess you're always in the mood for your little world, and I'm only second to it. How I wish to smash it into the wall, into millions of pieces, to have you wake up and take a look at the world. But how can I take it away from you, when it is basically your whole world?

All I want is for you to have more life in you, and for myself to be able to rely on you. I guess it is just too much to ask? What am I? Who exactly are you? Are you the one I danced with in the park under the stars? It was so long ago, I kind of forget how you feel like.

Boys.....

2009-07-30T14:34:00.006+08:00

Most of the time, I believe that male is the complicated one between the two species. However at occasions, I tend to think that males, regardless of age, young, adult, grown up or old, will always be just a boy at heart.

"Hey, you like cold drinks?"

"Yea, why?"

"Let me intro you something nice"

"Okay"

.................................................

"Try it, nice?"

"Hmmmm"

"Nice, right? Nice right?"

"Yea, not bad"

"What about the guava?"

"Wait, haven try"

"Try it, it's very nice"

"Oooo"

"Nice, nice?"

"Normal only...."

"It's the powder with the guava, very nice one.
Let me see, hmmm you haven't taste the powder part yet"

~Upon finishing the guava~

"Did you taste the powder? It's very expensive one, cost more than the guava itself. Nice ho?"
~excited face~

~amused~
"Yea, it's very nice"

~smug and satisfied face~

If only they're this cute all the time, that will definitely safe a lot of heartache......

Still in shock

2009-07-22T21:11:00.003+08:00

I cannot believe it. Totally.....
How can something like this happen? It's not supposed to happen.

I'm lost. I don't know what to say, I don't know what to do.

It must hurt more to you than to anyone else now, I know you don't want to worry us, but sometimes, it's okay to be weak. Just want you to know that we're here. Love you.....

Unacceptable

2009-07-12T11:10:00.003+08:00

Had the worst result ever in my whole entire life. I really hope the coming semesters cannot get any worse than this. I knew this is coming when I did the finals last sem.

Disgraceful.

My mom's gonna flip when she sees the posted result slip later. Haizzz

Love-Hate Relationship

2009-07-08T14:10:00.004+08:00

How can it be bad when it feels so good?
How can it be wrong when it seems so right?
How can it bring me comfort, yet strings of depression later?

Why do I love you so much, knowing that you'll bring me harm?
It makes me crazy trying to deprive myself off you.................

cheesecake
pasta
muffins
ice-creams
chocolates
siew pao
onii
laksa
kolo mee
kueh chap
pork legs
curry
durians

Even running trough your names makes my tummy long for you >.<

We, us, ours................

2009-06-30T13:52:00.008+08:00

I waited for you to turn around
I wished for loving gaze
I longed for your protective embrace

At times I fell, I sobbed
and yearned for your out-reached hands.
As time and coldness proved your absence, I learnt
to stand up and wipe my own tears.

Once I thought I found the one,
Once I believed in perfection,
Once I know no heartache,
I was the luckiest girl alive.

I wanted to call it quits.
Days of indifference I'd endure no more.
I knew the passion that I had lost some times ago
can no longer be rekindled.

I was tired,
tired of running to you,
tired of being turned away,
tired of waiting,
tired of hoping,
tired of making all the effort
but end up instead with dullness in
my own spirit and soul.
It was over.

You surprised me with your will to hang on
You, who seldom make any decision
You, who let me take the lead always
You, who were passive in making plans
You, who prefered a laid-nack relationship

I was moved,
At least I still mean something to you
How much and how far are you willing to go for us?

It is my turn to watch, and
your turn to run after me........

Autism is not a barrier

2009-06-23T15:44:00.004+08:00

Sometimes, I wonder if you're conscious of our presence
When we look at you in marvel,
at things you do in awe,

I'm amazed at the simpleness of your thoughts
at the small world you live in
as you struggle with each steps forward

Do you grasp the meaning of
the applause when you complete a task
the joy of those who see you progress
the hope many have for your growth

Does it hurt you when people look at you differently
when people whisper as they point
when pity is shown and they treat you delicately

I wish I can do more to ease the world you live in
I wish I can understand things you are trying to reach us in your own unique way
I wish parents can see you as a gift in their lives
I wish the world can acknowledge you as part of the society

I will do in the little way I can to help your walk to be a smoother one
because you are in no way different from us in God's eye....

Sci-fiction

2009-06-04T16:36:00.003+08:00

I went to watch Terminator:Salvation night. Keat how die also want me to watch. Oh well.... It was nice, I suppose. Wasn't bad at all. My last experience with this genre of movie was Alien VS Predator. I had no idea what i was doing in the cinema. Well, Terminator was all right. I bet guys find it a beautiful creation, but it's just not my thing. Regardless, I'm looking forward for Transformer. It is something else. I just can't explain what makes it different, I just happen to like it =P

Super egg!!!

2009-05-30T15:38:00.001+08:00

I don't know how many of you knows that I'm a lover of eggs. Anything egg, boiled egg, hard boiled, half boiled, fried egg, scrambled egg, mashed egg, steamed egg, egg tart, egg sandwich, egg salad... whatever... Often, I feel a little guilty by using up 2-3 eggs in my cooking everyday, watching the number of eggs in the fridge disappearing linearly, sometimes exponentially. But you see, one egg at a time is just not enough. You can't taste the egg in the dish.

Last night, my sis came home beaming, telling me that she bought super size egg with normal price from one of her students. Man, I've never seen chicken eggs as big as these, it ws kinda spooky at first, like looking at mutated eggs.

Look at the comparison between the super egg and normal egg, and my FIST!!!

Best part is most of these eggs have 2 yolks, so it's exactly like 2 in 1 egg =D

Great Discovery in IRC

2009-05-29T14:33:00.001+08:00

Due to the finals, i spent the past 3-4 weeks camping in IRC, UTP's library with my coursemates. When things got bored, this is what we do...

I'm so dead when my result comes out this hols. Bang!!!

As cam-whoring became a normal routine in irc, i started taking photos everywhere I go. =P And I found the place that gives the best lighting, resulting in nice photos. The toilet!!! ^0^

I'm revived =)

2009-05-29T00:30:00.003+08:00

Went to Midvalley Megamall today with my sis.

First time I stepped into a 'real' shopping mall since Dec last year. Finally, I feel alive again =D

02-05-09 Bukit Keledang

2009-05-27T12:45:00.009+08:00

I was supposed to write this weeks ago, but with finals and all, I was just too lazy to sit down and write a proper post.

On the night before 2nd of May, a friend invited me to go mountain hiking. I was supposed to have praise and worship practice on that particular day, but I talked my worship team leader into letting me off. Seriously, I was kinda worried on how to face God if I happen to fall down the cliff and transported back 'home' during the climb. Good thing He decided it wasn't my time yet ^.^ In fact, I believed later that I was meant to go because along the journey, I learnt several valuable lessons. Understandings on some things just popped into my head one after another.

I was still lively and bubbly at the start, enjoying the view, the breeze and the relaxation of the walk, thinking that it would be just like that throughout the journey. Naive.... Not long after we started, i started to pant. There weren't any proper route and some parts were pretty sloppy. Man, I was so out of shape, stamina gone down the valley. I bet my Taekwon-do coach won't dare to admit that I was once in the Shadow Team >.<). Thanks to a friend who noticed my discomfort( I bet it was pretty obvious >.<)he gave me his hand and guided me through the rest of the climb. With his assuring lead, my senses came slowly back to me, relieved somehow to feel that there's someone I can rely on physically. He was very encouraging, talking and motivating me all the way. Mostly, i only manage to nod and smile. But many things were running through my mind.

1. Finishing the race
The first thing that ran through my mind was pastor's repeated urging for us to run and finish the race. The spiritual race for every Christian is not an easy one. We need to be strong enough not only to face obstacles but also the overcome our own weaknesses. Most times when the spirit is willing, our body tend to fail us. So weak is our body. However, we must make our body obey us, and not submitting to its frailness.

2. Importance of brothers and sisters in Christ
Many times when I felt like just giving up, his endless motivations kept me going. No one can run the race alone, we all need someone to pull us up when we stumble.

3. Recognizing God's presence and learn to rely on Him
Often, we feel safe when we can see help physically. I can trust immediately in the aid that came with his extended hand but often, when God tried to reach out to us, to comfort and hold us in our fear, the lack of faith in Him prevented us from receiving the peace He guaranteed us. I must learn to rely and walk towards God's open arms just as I had accepted my friend's help without doubt.

4. Greatest fall/obstacle may come just right before we finish the race
The destination was just 2 meters away, one last slope and I could proudly say i conquered the hill. But as I raised my right foot, pain shot through my muscle, all the way up my thigh and I can't help but collapse. I experienced one the worst cramp I've ever had. Things got worse when I tried to move my left leg and the same thing happened. Cramp on both legs, that was a first. I had to sit down with my legs stretched for 10 whole minutes before I can relax the muscle.

5. Fix our sight on the Lord/ mind over body
If we focus on finishing the race instead of the hardship or fear for our surroundings, we gain more strength to move forward. At the end of the day, everything will be worth it. One example from the bible was Peter walking on water. He made a few steps when he fixed his eyes on Jesus, but when he looked around and saw the roaring sea, fear seeped into him and he began to drown.

The climb was a great experience. Though it was hard for me, and I still felt wobbly a long time after reaching the top, the value of this experience is inexplicable. Still, I managed to take some photos. =P

Just recovered from the cramp and barely conscious.
But I can still smile for a camera anytime =P

Feeling less dizzy dy

Finally can stand up liao =)

Coursemates
From the left: Ronny, me and Andrey

I dunno half of the names of these people,
the climb was actually organized by Ronny's church, still
it was great to be with them =P

T.T

2009-05-01T12:00:00.003+08:00

I'm beginning to face the consequences of my 'black-out' period earlier this semester. Each and every paper I took are coming back to me one by one, telling me that I'm so gonna flunk this sem =( I have no idea how to save myself. It seems so impossible, final's gonna be much harder than the tests. How?? Lord, save me T.T

The Forgotten

2009-04-24T22:35:00.003+08:00

It has been a long time since I last felt it... This familiar yet distant sensation. Going to a test with contentment that I had studied, answering questions with recollections from my mind, walking out of a test room knowing that somehow, things will be alright, and going back to my room with a confidence that whatever result I may get, will not be too bad.

Ever since the beginning of this semester, i spent sleepless nights studying things I have no memory of during the tests. My mind had been so distracted, and the irony is that, I have no idea what I was thinking most of the time. I walked into test rooms after test rooms with fear, and came out each time feeling more of a scum than before. I thought my brain had stopped functioning, and that it's time I give in to the fact that I've somehow caught idiocy.

Maybe it was God's warning to me, that I really shouldn't take things for granted. Not everyone is as quick to learn and understand. I should take more time to understand them, and be thankful for the brain I was blessed with. Thank God He had not decided to take it all back. Finally, I felt a touch of what I had before. Praise God that I was able to study and remember, and thank God for the awesome study partner I had this afternoon. It was amazing how comfortable and calm I still felt despite the outcome of my first test and with the clock ticking so near. Thanks, mate =) and Lord, You are my shepherd. Thank You Lord for bringing me back whenever i walk astray.

Melodious Rendezvous

2009-04-11T23:15:00.004+08:00

Days have been hectic, as expected of UTP life. Last week's Melodious Rendezvous was wonderful. Although only half of the hall if filled, 1000 is quite a big group of audience. Here are some photos...

Our section head, girl from keat hwa... only 17!

ahh, youth...

Guy in the middle, Wen Zhun, a prominent flutist (di zhi player) in Malaysia. Only 24.. haih, why these people can have success in life so early

My dearests
Karen - from KL to Ipoh, next day had to go all the way to sitiawan to go back KL
Keat How and Amy - from Johor, 20 hours to and fro
Thank you soooo much guys... Hugs hugs

The girl is Laura. Super tall, and pretty =P
The man is our instructor. Malaysia's best conductor 2008

Miss XiYao Chen - world's top 10 er hu player
she was awesome during the concert